I LOVE HOUSE HUNTERS INTERNATIONAL. Brilliant TV show.
I've learned so much about: 1) couple dynamics; 2) relationships; 3) everyone wants an open floor plan, granite countertops and stainless steel appliances.
As I crossed the 1/2 way mark of this Dating Detox, I had a HUGE discovery (unexpectedly triggered by watching House Hunters International).
Love Lesson: I don't know what's best for me, especially in the realm of love.
Whenever I have a crush on a guy, I can almost guarantee it's not going to happen. That's not how love works.
Almost every single House Hunters International love story goes like this:
1) A guy is smitten with a girl. She's not interested. He's not 'her type.'
2) He pursues her. She says no a bunch of times.
3) He remains hopeful and persistent and keeps asking her out.
4) She finally agrees to a date.
5) She discovers that he's a great guy.
6) They get married. They move to a foreign country to have an 'adventure' together. OR They buy a second home in a foreign country and live happily ever after.
It's a tale as old as time.
When a woman wants a man, it goes against biological programming. The woman is not born to be a hunter. And women are incredible at making shit up as to who a guy is in comparison to who he really is.
Women aren't good at picking a mate. We're good at letting the right mate pick us.
I hate to say that as an independent, smart, capable, business-minded woman, but the more research I do, the more apparent it is. Just like in nature, the fancy male bird picks a female bird, dances around for her, throws his bright-colored feathers around for her, tries to impress her. She says 'yes' and they mate. That's it. She doesn't go from 'guy bird' to 'guy bird' hoping each one likes her. That's not Nature.
Every time I see a guy that I'm attracted to, I pause and remember that I'm not good at picking a mate. As a woman, my capacity for fantasy exceeds my capacity for acknowledging reality, especially in world of love. That's how we're programmed.
I just gotta wait for that 'male bird' to be patient and persistent, dance for me, try to impress me and make me say 'yes' to going on a non-traditional date with him.
Until then, I get to fully love and live my life, free from crushes and dating drama.
Free as a 'lady bird.'
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